Mission Semi-Impossible: Day Seven: Return to Glory
First things first: All apologies to anyone who tried to get on the blog on Monday and found it crashed. Apparently (and, let’s be honest, understandably) our server can’t handle…
First things first: All apologies to anyone who tried to get on the blog on Monday and found it crashed. Apparently (and, let's be honest, understandably) our server can't handle pictures of Sgt Slaughter next to a shirtless Steve McQueen. Lesson learned.
Next order of business: Frequent Blog commentator Trina dropped a hint yesterday that Elisabeth Hasselbeck could be pregnant again, which forced me to release the Google hounds in a search for more info. According to Celebrity Baby Blog, my source for all news and politics baby info, there is reason to believe both sides: on one hand, they point out E Hass is wearing flowy clothes but, on the other hand, they make the very necessary point that "Elisabeth mentioned on the show a few times last fall that she is trying to stay away from her husband (Seattle Seahawks QB) Tim to avoid getting pregnant again! She joked that she brushes her teeth for a very long time in hopes that he will be asleep by the time she gets to bed!" Icing her husband with long teeth cleaning and wearing flowy clothes? I dunno, kind of smells like a rocky marriage to me Trina...
Anyway, if I had to venture a guess about the alleged Hasselbeck pregnancy, I would contend that they're waiting until they lock up Raven (or Tom Cruise handcuffed to Psychiatrist) before she drops the P word to maximize a total ratings bonanza!! And you thought this was just about writing...
Final Pre-Writing Pop Culture Related Editorial Sidenote: The other day(s) I accidentally watched three episodes of the latest Bachelor: Officer and a Gentleman. And while he may be an Officer, he certainly is no gentleman. (Bonus Prediction: Assuming Bevin Doesn't Kill Everyone, My Lock to Win Ms. Gentleman: Danielle. She's a handsome woman, and according to previews, her father appears to be the real life version of the Muppet Beaker)
Whew. Good talk. Moving on...
Words: 2343
Feelings:Elation, Invincibility, An Increased Sense of Self Worth
Sins: No sins were committed in the making of this blog post..
Fears: My computer would melt from the speed I was typing, that someone would interrupt my barrage of perfect ideas for pushing plot forward and I would accidentally throw them down the stairs, going back and revising the chapters I wrote years ago, that I'll never ride in a limo with a hot tub.
Thoughts:My friend and fellow world traveler Casey, aka The Big Cat, is a man of many sayings. One of those sayings is "Don't stay up staring at me when I'm sleeping. Seriously, it freaks me out" but the more important and relevant saying for today is "Just Do It". Now, whether he ripped Nike off or Nike ripped him off is irrelevant, the point is that sometimes you have to quit your talking, quit your stalling and just...um, well, you remember.
So finally, finally, I wrote the climatic scene. I stopped playing around and did it. It took less than 3 hours for me to write all 2300 words, which never happens. And I was into it. It was a tense and confrontational scene, and I found myself sweating and nervous as the words flowed out of my fingertips like pseudo lava in one of those science experiment things thats actually just baking soda, vinegar, and red food coloring. When it was over, I knew I had nothing left in me for the day. I was physically, emotionally, and mentally drained. I felt like I'd just worked out, then taken an AP Latin exam and then broke up a (potentially rocky?) celebrity marriage. But, like, in a really good way.
Questions to Ponder: Can I keep up the scalding pace? Do I keep pushing forward or take a step back and outline? Will my father reveal where he keeps the key to the liquor cabinet in exchange for a free Steve McQueen ringtone?
In the Hot Tub Poppin' Bubbly,
Big,
Pun
PS: Pictured Below: A rare photo of Danielle from the Bachelor's father, the actual Bachelor copping patriotic but ungentlemanly feels, and below: a romantic first-date location.

Jane Friedman is a full-time entrepreneur (since 2014) and has 20 years of experience in the publishing industry. She is the co-founder of The Hot Sheet, the essential publishing industry newsletter for authors, and is the former publisher of Writer’s Digest. In addition to being a columnist with Publishers Weekly and a professor with The Great Courses, Jane maintains an award-winning blog for writers at JaneFriedman.com. Jane’s newest book is The Business of Being a Writer (University of Chicago Press, 2018).