Re: Re: Prince Charming–I’d love some feedback on this

Home Forums Critique Central Children’s Prince Charming–I’d love some feedback on this Re: Re: Prince Charming–I’d love some feedback on this

#513962

grob
Participant

Hi,
A story about what happens to Prince Charming once he is turned into a toad would be fun! (Setting up a kingdom in the pond) I think you have a good start here, but I would suggest that you look at your opening to figure out how to grab your reader instantly. Also, you need to figure out where you are taking this character? You might want to read the story to refresh your memory, or maybe change his name if you are changing the premise of the tale. His size is a problem for me, (large as a hippo), maybe you could choose something large, but more within reach. Don’t get discouraged, and keep up the good work! There is a lot of potential here.
D