Re: RE: First three chapter study

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#408817

rog0622
Participant

Okay, new day, new book, same exercise.  This author has a couple of words that have been repeated at least seven times in the first three chapters.  Writing ease level about six.  Passive sentences at 4%.  I didn’t find myself stopping to type because I wanted to read. BTW, same genre.

This particular author jumped into the action right away.  On the surface, you would think that should make for more immediacy and interest.  But it actually seemed too fast in this case, because I didn’t know or care about the character first.   It seemed set up and phony.  I love to get to the action early in a book, but I need a bit of “foreplay” so I’m “in the mood” to be seduced.  Also, because I knew nothing about the characters, things that could have easily been handled in a few lines of deft stage setting now became back story and flashback.  I’m not a big fan of flashbacks.  Sometimes they can’t be avoided, but in this case I felt like it was just poor management.

This author has also sold over thirty books.  When I chose my three books to study, I tried to pick three that would be as much alike as possible.

The odd thing is, the first author is not nearly as skilled as this second one, but I actually enjoyed the reading experience much more.  The passive useage did irritate me, but I found myself willing to “work it out” with her, because she’s interesting.  This second author is stylistically superior, but her writing just doesn’t grab me.  There is an emotional appeal missing that is the strong suit of the first author.

Also, the second author introduced too many characters at once, and some of them I didn’t have quite straight even by the third chapter.  I don’t like that.  I need to know and care about the characters.  Similiar sounding names also really added to the confusion.

The plot is more sophisticated in the second book.  The descriptions are more detailed.  The problem is, and I can’t exactly put my finger on it, I just don’t really care.  It’s too cut and dry.  There is definitely an “it” factor missing.  For my money, this author is better suited to technical writing.  Obviously this is only my opinion.  She’s sold more than thirty books, she must have a following.  But I won’t be adding myself to her fan club.  Riv