The western author, Louis L’Amour wrote about men: “A man who lives for a woman ain’t much of a man.” That may not be 100% accurate, but your work made me think of that. Points for you – anything that makes me think of Louis is good.
I’m not a poet, nor do I know any rules, but the ellipsis don’t work for me, particularly in a work this short. They distract and add ambiguity.
Oh, you also get points for making poetry your first post, this is a tough gig. There’s real talent here, so if you get an ‘attaboy’ on this forum, you’re doing well.