I’m not sure where to go with this. What is the context of this excerpt? Why the tirade? Who is your protagonist and what is his story? What is the cause of so much anger? I think this passage is written well enough. I did not, however, care for the tone. It’s overly harsh and, in my opinion, too confrontational. Again, that may be because the context is unclear. Is the hostility justified? If so, that’s the part of the story I’d like to read.