Re: Re: Autumn

Home Forums Critique Central Poetry AUTUMN Re: Re: Autumn

#390078

kimberley
Participant

It’s good. Now, not to be nitpicky, but if you get rid of “the” in line two you will be able to paint an even clearer picture.
Autumn afternoon
____ gentle breeze kisses trees
soft leaf drifts away

What kind of gentle breeze? How did it feel? Cool? Crisp? Sweet?