Re: RE: Autumn

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#390075

WBNH
Participant

Writing?maybe!! – 2009-09-10 5:30 PM

Autumn afternoon
gentle breeze kisses the tree (not sure if I should say tree or tree’s)
a leaf drifts away

ehh…tell me what you guys think.

Autumn afternoon
gentle breeze kisses the tree’s
soft leaf drifts away

I couldn’t really figure out what to do with the a because I’m trying to stick to a traditional Haiku, and most my preferable options would give it to many syllables. What do you guys think of calling it soft instead?