Re: Fishing

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Christina Katz

We sit on the dock, the water is calm
Hoping the fish will bite all day long
My wife sits next to me applying some lip balm
Oh she doesn’t know that this is all wrong

I take out a big, juicy worm
Then I show her a trick
Rip it half and watch it squirm
Her face turns green, she’s about to be sick

I tell her to take the worm and feed it on the hook
She looks at me without out even a grin
And says, “I can’t. It’ll ruin my look”
This is going to be a long day. At least I have a bottle of gin.

I throw both our poles into the water
I look over as she is applying make up to her cheeks
In this relationship as you can tell, I am the martyr
I do not believe that this marriage will last many more weeks

I am now lost into my critical train of thought
I didn’t even realize that a pole just flew in the lake
It was my expensive rod and reel that I just bought
Oh how this woman makes my blood bake

As I now pack the rest of our things to go
I realize that I have a bite on the other line
She starts to speak with her insanity lingo
I reel the pole in and see a big catfish looking mighty fine

I grab the fish and hold it up for her to see
But out of my hands the big monster slips
She lets out a horrific scream and tries to get to her knees
I couldn’t help but laugh when it smacked her in the lips

She slowly gets up as she starts to bawl
I start to snicker as I see fish slime roll down her chin
I said “What did you expect this was? A trip to the mall.”
She was crying so hard, she didn’t see the edge of the dock, and she fell in

The trip home was not a pleasant one
I looked over and saw her hair standing on end
I asked her “didn’t you have just a little fun?”
She reached back, grabbed my fishing pole and started to bend

Well, I guess that answered my question
She turned back around and didn’t look at me the rest of the ride
So please gentlemen learn from this so you aren’t in the same position
Always leave you girl at home because she’ll put a crimp in your pride