How to describe this action?

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jaus tail
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How to describe this action?

Postby jaus tail » Sun May 12, 2013 11:23 pm

My character moves his lower jaw up and down and collides thet teeth against each other, like tuck tuck tuck tuck. as in you flash your teeth, then grit them and then lower your lower jaw then again grit you teeth and do it in succession to show pride/anger/war preparation.

how do i word it?
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Anya Kylash
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby Anya Kylash » Sun May 12, 2013 11:28 pm

He ground his teeth together, flashing his glaring smile like a mad baboon.
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rosebud
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby rosebud » Mon May 13, 2013 12:03 am

My husband does this. It drives me nuts. I always respond by saying, "Don't grit your teeth at me buster. I'll knock them out!" :mrgreen:

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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby jaus tail » Mon May 13, 2013 12:32 am

so did you ever knock them out? and have you stored the teeth like a work of art in your living room..
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby jaus tail » Mon May 13, 2013 12:35 am

he hasnt ground his teeth. he's moving them up and down, like vibrating his mouth in vertical direction. it's not a static motion, it's in continuity.
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby Laycrew » Mon May 13, 2013 12:45 am

That is a tough one, Jaus. I think I know what you are describing and that's a tough one. It is sort of an action to be intimidating and show dominance. The only thing I can think of to describe it for the moment is:

"He jutted out his jaw and clacked his teeth together repetitively." Probably a few more descriptions of threatening body actions to give the rest of what you are trying to portray.

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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby jaus tail » Mon May 13, 2013 12:55 am

makes sense. laycrew jutted her jaw out and clacked her teeth repetitively in front of the math professor, Ms Keene. Keene pouted her lips and asked the five year old student to get up and recite the tables. Laycew got up and shrugged her shoulders, saying, "I don't know."

"Is this the way to talk? Laycrew where are your manners?"

Laycrew hung out her tongue.

"Ahh! How dare you Laycrew? You have crossed all lines of deceny, you mischievious girl?"

"I know," replied Laycrew, "I like being bad."

She ran around. Keene chased her with a cane, the two ran in circles. "Come back here," yelled Keene.

"No," replied Laycrew, she grabbed the book from the desk and threw on the professor's face, then grabbed the duster and threw at her feet. She spread her hands, whatever she could grab, she picked it and threw it towards Keene.

Keene fell on the ground and said, "That's it, I'm resigning."

A week later Laycrew was felicitated by the illegal student body commission of the school for being the bravest kid around. she wore the badge with honor.
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby Laycrew » Mon May 13, 2013 1:13 am

:lol: :lol: Love it! Even more so because did you know I worked at an elementary school? Now I'm having flashbacks. ;) :D It would have been more fun being the naughty child rather than being the one reprimanding.

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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby jaus tail » Mon May 13, 2013 2:49 am

Laycrew folded her hands as she saw the exchange student in front of her. Anya was whistling with her hands behind her back. Laycrew slammed her left fist in her right palm and said, "Hello new student."

"Oh hi there, I'm Anya," she replied, "I'm from Czech. My country is supercool."

"yeah," said Laycrew, took a step towards her and said, "then why dont you go back there."

she raised her hand and it was about to hit the target whe Anya grabbed it, twisted around and jumped over her. she ran towards the school saying, "Catch me if you can."

Laycrew wiped the dust of her skirt and said, "Get her." her gang chased Anya. they chased her around the classes. Anya jumped off from one window to the other. she being thin managed to float through the air. the gang memebers didnt make it all, some had bruises as they fell down the balconey.

anya ran down the stairs, laycrew's gang followed. when they entered playground, anya pulled the swing hard then released it. it hit hard on laycrew's gang's faces as their teeth broke.

'Yuppie,' said anya and turned around when she felt a hand on her shoulder. in front of her, she saw the biggest bully of them all. the rest of students shivered with fear as they saw the woman who confronted anya, the woman was 'she who shall not be named..' anya's former rival..rosebud
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LMGilbert
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Re: How to describe this action?

Postby LMGilbert » Mon May 13, 2013 7:49 am

Cool story you got going there, jaus! I've often felt that some of these forum threads can easily devolve into something resembling a kindergarten playground;)

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