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New Poem, "Sensory Over Load" : Poetic Asides • Writing Forum | WritersDigest.com

New Poem, "Sensory Over Load"

Network with other poets, including fans of Robert Lee Brewer's Poetic Asides blog.
Billie Bowman Daddario
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New Poem, "Sensory Over Load"

Postby Billie Bowman Daddario » Tue Jun 10, 2014 3:56 pm

Sensory Over Load

Dizzying days of too much sun,
Leathery dark coffee colored skin.
Brightly colored swoosh of Dervish dancing,
Whirling spinning skirts.
And the swirl of spices,
Pungent, savory, sweet and warm.
Venders whoop, “I have a bargain come and buy”
Cacophony clatter chaos sounds.
Limonlu Kareler swaddled in a kerchief
Eaten with dark rich coffee.

Storylover02
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Re: New Poem, "Sensory Over Load"

Postby Storylover02 » Wed Jun 11, 2014 11:24 am

This really is a sensory overload! You did a great job with appealing to each sense in great detail. Also I love your use of alliteration such as "dervish dances".

Billie Bowman Daddario
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Re: New Poem, "Sensory Over Load"

Postby Billie Bowman Daddario » Wed Jun 11, 2014 1:12 pm

Thanks, I love alliteration even pros. It emphasizes without bold letters or saying to someone this is important listen to me.

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bupaje
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Re: New Poem, "Sensory Over Load"

Postby bupaje » Fri Jun 20, 2014 4:06 pm

Well I had to look up "Limonlu Kareler" (and 'alliteration' to be strictly honest) and I think you did a wonderful job. It is amazing how the reader can create such a vivid scene over a few well chosen words.





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