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Postby kerrymichaelwood » Wed Nov 13, 2013 1:31 pm

(I MAY have posted this some years ago. If so, sorry.)


‘Cause rotting in the sun, fish smelt so bad
I plaiced a tarp on a dead dogfish.
Don’t like to give my cat fish.
But since she was sniffin’ round,
I tossed a chunk of haddock to Puss.
When I had time to mullet Dover,
I snook a look, just for the halibut.
My guts began to flounder.
Never sawfish look so crappie!
Since I was near a bar ah coulda,
Put t’ rout my heaving gorge,
Drinkin’ beer til ah pee a bit.
Such was my strongest urgin’.
Didn’t do it on porpoise.
I’m hard of herring, atrophied of mussel,
And as Cod’s my wetness,
Blind as a small-mouth bass turd.

For calling Phil A. Aswhole.
Tried to buy some coke ‘n he
Had some shnook gimme a sock I
Didn’t see comin’. Woke up in
Some dungeon as I felt
A skull pin stuck in my head.
Had Paul Lock fish it out,
With his orca straw’s pike.
The one he waves to conduct
“I’ll Take Menhaden.”
“Bream When You’re Feeling Bluefish.”
“Blennies from Heaven,”
“Salmon Chanted Evening,”
“Me and My Shad Roe” and
“The Boogie Woogie Bluegill Boy.”
O No! Nearly forgot “Tuna yet? Tuna Yet?”
From “The Wet Side’s Dory”
Sung by Lou Trawls, with some grouper other.
His biggest char buster since
“Trolling Down the Reefer.”

When I graduated from high school in Spain,
We marched to Lock’s
Orcastral recording of
“Pompano Circumstance,”
By Eduardo El Gar.

Lock’s a little shrimp
Just sardine out in podnership with
Ann Jovi, Finn & Haddy.
Billed me six quid.
But…Aw, he’s to me the Manatee Hour!

No taxis in the cabby zone
So we hadda limpet home,
But nautilus’d been shad on
By a gull, my mortal anemone.
Tried to spear ‘im but he
Went off at a scallop.

“Wahoo!” Mm my w-w-w-wife like to
Laugh turbot off.
(Excuse me, I tender st-st-otter a tad,
Polish being my first lingo.)
Threatened to croaker—
I only manta rays
A noise ter clam her up.
If I smack ‘er I’ll be guilty
Of spousal mollusk station.

If you see any more res absurdis,
With which this crock abalone
Could congergate,
Let minnow.

Walleye think it’s time to reel ‘em up.
Snagged a few keepers;
Thresher otter be scuttled!

Mus’ key off now.
Sky’s misting gray.
Betta quit,
If you’ll permit.

I gotta guppy.

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