April PAD Challenge: Day 29

Yay! So many of you have made it past the sestina! And I’m still alive, though I’m sure many of you no longer consider me your friend. 😉

It’s nice to put in a very tough exercise every so often (don’t worry, the final two days should be a little more relaxed). In fact, with the weather getting so nice around Southwestern Ohio the past week or two, exercise (the physical kind) has been big on my mind.

Way back in March, I must’ve known I’d be in an exercising mood, because the first “Two for Tuesday” prompt is to write a poem about exercise. For most people, you either love it or hate it. If you do exercise regularly, it would be interesting to know whether you do it for the end result (that is, good health, a trim physique, etc.) or the process itself (just because it feels good to move).

Prompt #2 is a little more open-ended for people who don’t have any emotions whatsoever attached to exercise. For this prompt, I want you to write a poem in the 2nd person.

Here’s my poem of the day (combining the two prompts into one poem):

“How to go running on an August morning”

Start off with some stretches. Do your legs
first, then your arms. Walk to your starting point
and begin with a light jog. Let your muscles and
lungs ease into a rhythm. Focus on keeping
your wrists and hands slack. Relax your shoulders
and bottom lip. After the first mile, lengthen
your stride while keeping your breathing balanced.
Listen to the birds. Keep your head straight.
Relax your shoulders, your hands, your bottom lip.
Focus on your next step, not on the finish line;
stay within yourself. After the fifth mile, pull
off your shirt. Feel the sun on your skin as it begins
to warm the earth. Imagine you are winning a race.
Imagine someone is only a few steps behind;
lose that person. Relax your shoulders but keep
up a fast pace. Do this through the finish line.

 

You might also like:

  • No Related Posts

146 thoughts on “April PAD Challenge: Day 29

  1. Tyger Valverde

    Pumping

    You kicked the cat again last night
    after a fourteen hour day
    Then I just stopped you
    from punching your kid out
    Go to the gym I say
    Pick up those weights
    dumbells ten pounds heavier than yesterday
    with all that stored-up anger
    You’ll pump them just fine
    I’ll watch your guns swell
    until the veins stick out like ropes
    Keep pumping
    Until all the rage rolls out
    and you sag to the ground
    You’ll not mow the lawn today
    but at least we’ll be safe

  2. Lori

    Wispy candy,like cotton,
    it sticks to the sky
    and the breeze blows softly
    across my skin as I walk.
    Inhaling the ocean air and
    shutting out all sounds,
    other than the driving music
    which forces my feet to move
    quickly across the pavement.
    Destination uncertain,
    just to walk and to move
    and to feel and to live.
    An exercise of the body,
    a restfulness of the mind.
    I let everything go and it’s
    one foot in front of the other.

  3. Linda H.

    Sorry. I just came in to read the poems again and noticed mine wasn’t here. Don’t know what happened but here it is again:

    RUNNING

    Running hard
    Running fast
    Running from a painful past

    Running longer
    Running in place
    Runing in circles in life’s rat race

    Running slower
    Running out of breath
    Running toward imminent death

    Running upward
    Running free
    Running through eternity

    Linda Hofke

  4. S.E. Ingraham

    WARM UP, COOL DOWN

    Exercise – harrumph
    The word itself has so many connotations,
    Some of them good, lots of them bad
    Many evoke strong reactions
    As in, ‘exercise your franchise,
    get out and vote!’
    Exercise your mind
    Use your brain, your head
    Exercise some control, for heaven’s sake
    Rein yourself in – don’t show – emotions,
    Do not ‘over-do’ anything
    And you mustn’t get yourself all exercised
    – i.e. worked, up distressed
    But you should exercise your body
    Oh yes
    For any number of reasons
    All of them laudable:
    To improve your health, your appearance
    To train for a specific means of employment
    To show off at the gym (okay – maybe not all of them laudable)
    But to train your body so you can get work?
    Well, I hear to qualify as a rookie police officer
    You have to be able to do an inhumane number of chin-ups
    The armed forces used to be as stringent with their
    qualification requirements
    But lately I hear they exercise less discerning judgement
    And will take most anyone
    With a pulse
    Ah, but in order to avoid
    getting unnecessarily exercised,
    I shall defer that particular exercise
    to another day, another poem.

    S.E.Ingraham

  5. Karen

    4-29-08

    Exercise

    The idea sounds like work.
    I mean, didn’t we do exercises in
    phonics, math, and social studies?

    Could I just say,
    "Let’s walk up to the end of the road to see the bison."
    "I’m going to stroll around the block
    and find out what the neighbors are up to."
    "Come on, we’ll go hit some tennis."
    "The elevator’s slow, I’m taking the stairs."
    "The dog needs to go out and stretch his legs."
    "It’s easier to find parking out here in Egypt,
    away from the store."
    "Walk with me. We can hold hands and talk.
    And we’ll live longer together."

  6. Anahbird

    Only When

    You take out the trash
    You clean the house
    You say please
    And thank you
    You do your homework
    Without a word

    You are only sweet
    And thoughtful and nice
    Caring, considerate and compassionate
    When you’ve done wrong
    Or you have undesirable news
    Hovering on the horizon.

    So what is it?

  7. Jay Sizemore

    Politician

    You are not who
    you said you were,
    how does it feel
    to be a liar?

    Do you paint your face
    every day to include
    that smile that you wear?

    Do you think
    you have the world fooled?
    Do you think
    you are that smart?
    Do you like
    wearing the skin
    of a decomposed sheep?

    How do you sleep?

    You must be a robot,
    every word you say
    seems pre-planned,
    every movement a force
    of will and gears turning
    to complete the illusion
    of being human.

    How do you sleep?

  8. Judy Roney

    Exercise

    I exercise at the very clean
    very new YMCA in Florida.
    I read a book while I walk
    the treadmill for thirty minutes.

    I exericse at the very clean
    very new looking Rec Center
    in Haywood County when I am
    in North Carolina. I enjoy both
    and hate leaving each behind,
    I get used to the machines and
    enjoy meeting my friends at each.

    I exercise five days a week
    have since my husband and I began
    about five years ago. I should be
    healthy but I eat junk food. I should
    be trim but I eat junk food. I should
    look fit but I eat a lot of junk food.

    I feel better when I exercise
    healthier and more fit, able to keep
    up with my very atheletic husband
    on walks. My joints work better
    when I am exercising. Lots of reasons
    to keep it up but I do get embarrassed
    telling someone I work out as much as
    I do. Now I say, couldn’t you tell, when
    they say you do?

  9. Susan Reichert

    Exercise Along

    I go for a walk
    and then take a swim
    I come home and
    get out my bar bells.
    I turn on the music
    and move with the
    beat by now I can
    look at me in my
    mirror and say wow
    look at me.

    Susan
    April 29
    Day 29

  10. Sheryl Kay Oder

    This last poem is a combination of exercise, use of the second person (at times, that is), a ramble poem, and variation on a prompt on the newly-formed Poetic Asides forum. The prompt was to start a poem with a one-word title and add a word for each line. Well, I decided to go backwards, too. Of course I cheated by using contractions.

    In other words, I sort of threw it together for fun to finish the month. I have already finished yesterday’s poem. Hooray!

    You

    That’s right–
    you sitting there.
    You need to exercise.
    I don’t mean your brain.
    OK, I’m not one to talk.
    Our treadmill is sitting upstairs collecting dust.
    We have been exercising our option to write.
    But PAD is over as of yesterday.
    Yes, we can write poems late.
    Then come the perseverance awards.
    At least do chores.
    That’s lifestyle exercise.
    Do it.
    Now

  11. Hope Greene

    Morning Prayer, 6 a.m.

    There’s always the anticipation of cold
    That doubly sweetens
    The warm landscape of my wife
    The valley of our bed
    Flowing with milk and honey,
    But before the bell arrows thrice
    Through the air, Intoning my impending discipline
    I make the break and fly down the hill.
    There’s always a chill, always the damp chill of
    Eight hours without a sun
    So the cloak my father lent is welcome.
    In the whole northern morning
    The only thing that moves before you
    Are the mists and the droplets of glass
    Sound that the birds make
    Stealing your virtuous thunder with play
    As you break the fog with your body
    And gather with your brothers at the last
    First bell’s bong, for the soul’s daily weights-
    Silence and a spoken song.

  12. LindaTK

    Day 29
    Exercise

    Again

    Many people do
    Many people don’t
    It’s that inner voice
    telling you that “it’s time”
    Act on it
    It has been my experience
    that it begins as something
    that needs to be done
    for ones health and well-being
    After time has passed
    and one has kept at it
    it becomes an addiction
    When I gave birth
    to my daughter
    I began to run
    to get off the poundage
    It was so difficult
    Out of breath
    Sweaty
    Thirsty
    Heart pounding
    Body yelling, “Stop!”
    I kept at it
    adding miles a bit at a time
    Fifteen years later
    I ran a marathon
    Endorphins?
    Sense of well-being?
    Addiction?
    For me, it was all of that
    Fifteen years later
    Arthritis
    Weak Knees
    Bad back
    Broken ankle
    now healed
    full of pins, bolts, plates
    Weaker bones
    Haven’t run for fifteen years
    Stopped abruptly
    after the marathon
    Now, I need to
    get back at it
    I will walk this time
    I need to keep at it
    My inner voice is telling me
    “It’s time”
    Again

  13. Ang

    In my dreams
    I run
    Effortless
    Like Forrest Gump
    I can leap
    High in the air
    Over hurdles

    In my life
    I walk
    Effortless
    Like breathing
    My mind leaps
    Into the future
    Over hurdles

    In my plans
    I continue
    Effortless
    Like a straight line
    My ideas leap
    Beyond today
    Over hurdles

  14. Monica Martin

    I’ve never been one for exercise
    I’m the first to admit
    I’d rather lounge on the couch.
    But since finding the dvd
    of bellydancing for fitness
    I’m ready to get fit.

    Hip lifts and rib slides
    Are difficult to pull off
    In my narrow room.
    But I am determined
    To move my body
    As those teachers two.

  15. Terri

    Work It!

    One more crunch
    One more bicep curl
    Feel the burn, girl

    Twenty more minutes on the stairmaster
    You’ve got to sweat it out, sister

    "You’re so lucky," the envious say
    Ain’t no luck to it baby
    You’ve earned every rippled muscle
    with the slick sweat of determination

    So, come on. . .
    One more crunch
    One more bicep curl,
    Feel that burn, girl

  16. Rosemary Nissen-Wade

    Bed With You

    When you lie close to me, my dear,
    on long, leisurely mornings,
    no wonder I’m reluctant
    to leave you alone in the bed.
    I’d rather cuddle up,
    stroke your thick, soft hair,
    murmur in your half-attentive ear.

    I love the way you stir a little,
    stretch your lazy limbs,
    then settle once again.
    Your warm breath on my cheek
    blows lightly, rhythmically.
    I put an arm around you
    gently, not to disturb.

    You make a muffled noise
    between a squeak and a grunt,
    but your eyes remain closed;
    you take a deeper breath.
    Soon I must rise, I think.
    Still I linger, smiling,
    as you twitch your whiskers and purr.

    © Rosemary Nissen-Wade 2008

  17. M. Schied

    Workout

    I prefer the exercise of the mind over the body
    Intellectual calisthenics, verbal jump-roping
    Debating ping-pong and sliding down verses of poetry
    Training my ears to pick up aural blunders
    while my larynx runs steps up and down the staff
    I play hide-and-seek with my novel companions
    impatiently counting to ten before I dive into the pool of words
    and if all this exercise leaves me cranky and perspiring
    a cool bike ride through the sunset seems to make it all work out.

  18. Jolanta laurinaitis

    Why do I touture you
    When you make me live
    Why do I deny you pleasures
    When you make me breathe
    Why do I strain you
    When you allure others
    Because I hate that lump.
    That one
    Bumpy
    Lumpy
    Lump.

  19. Sara Diane Doyle

    The Love Affair

    You light the candles
    and put your favorite cd
    in the player. Turn
    the volume down low,
    but not too soft.
    Tighten the tie that secures
    the robe—the only barrier
    between the rest of the world
    and that cute teddy you bought.
    Check your hair in the mirror—twice.
    Another coat of lip gloss,
    the super shiny kind
    that tastes like mint.
    You fingers tap the dresser—
    a nervous ditty
    What if he didn’t get his invitation
    to this love affair?

  20. Judy Stewart

    ok so I skipped the sestinal one day out of the month, maybe I will figure out how to do one and post it later for what ever may be going on in May here is the poem for day 29

    Day 29 poem

    You are going to do a Polar Bear swim
    well really it is not cold but it is early
    so why not call it an early bird swim?
    Anyway, you are at a camp for kids with cancer
    and three mornings of the week there is an early
    Morning swim across the lake.
    you walk to the pier
    you try to wake up,
    you see all of the others
    who have braved the morning
    you jump in the water
    with the other side in view
    swimming or paddling
    how ever you can get there
    and hope you don’t have to
    get in the boat
    before getting to the other side
    finally you arrive
    on the other side
    out of breath,
    arms and legs burning
    and now the big decision…
    Do you swim back or take the boat?

  21. Yoli

    Call Me

    You were here

    When I didn’t want to be alone.

    So I wasn’t.

    Now I want to be your friend

    But now we can’t seem to get that right

    All because of one night.

  22. Sarah

    Calisthenics and Running
    Arobics and Weights
    Yoga, Booty and, are you kidding!..Ballet?
    each stlye claims it’s best
    but running is out
    because of my knee
    and while Yoga gives poise
    it didn’t reduce my size
    Arobics and Weights
    I try to combine
    with a good healthy diet
    to get the best
    overall workout
    that I can also
    change up.

  23. Diane

    Bruce Niedt, in spite of my two poems being negative on exercise, I really try to keep at it. Mind if I keep a copy of your poem handy to remind me of that? Kudos to you for being so positive.

  24. Tonya Root

    Look Away!

    Please don’t make me
    I don’t wanna!
    Those are muscles
    I haven’t used in years.
    Please don’t look at me
    like that now!
    I just don’t think I can.
    Please just let it go
    for goodness sake!
    I will have to do it
    another day.

    I really have to put
    that treadmill away.
    It’s starting to
    creep me out!

  25. Beth Browne

    Hot Water

    I am one of those people
    who live to eat
    and only do exercise
    to counter the calories.

    For me, the best part
    of working out
    is the shower afterwards.
    An excuse to stand still,
    let my eyes fall closed
    breathe the steam
    calm and clean.

  26. Peggy Goetz

    Exercise

    No matter what you say
    It never feels good
    I don’t like pain
    I don’t like to sweat
    No matter what you say
    I don’t like to exercise.

  27. Kateri Woody

    "Human Yo-Yo"

    You breaths are harsh, barely able
    to take the phosphate scented air in
    through swollen nostrils spewing blood
    all down your bright, new expensive suit.
    It’s a pity you can’t see the macabre pattern
    of drips and strands of thick red liquid
    that fall to the ground beneath your head
    because you know they’re making a beautiful
    attempt at emulating a Pollock painting
    as you’re hoisted into the night sky.

    You’re being used like a toy –
    a human yo-yo on a thick string strung high
    in the air, face partially broken and
    mouth wailing every time you’re
    jerked thirty feet or more feet into the air by your
    now dislocated ankle, spinning and spinning like
    a pretty techni-color toy top until a hand
    reaches out from nowhere and stops the whirling motion
    abruptly. Causes your world to wrench into focus so
    suddenly that you add a new color to the
    pavement painting by retching hard and vomiting
    orange tinted dinner which splatters
    paste like down your face and hair, mingling
    with the blood down below.

    You can’t speak through the vile bile taste
    assaulting your mouth no matter how hard
    you’re hit or how loud your assailant yells at you
    because it just isn’t possible to get the information
    to filter out correctly. You know what he wants
    to know, completely at ease at keeping
    it to yourself and only yourself because maybe
    this abuse is what you were looking
    for in the first place when you ignored
    the idle threats anyone could predict would
    come to fruition in the form of nose shattering
    blows and lofty insults aiming to get under
    your skin, into your head.

    You’re visibly pleased with yourself
    when you’re hurtled towards the ground once more,
    frustration being evoked in the invisible attacker
    and transferred onto your beaten body –
    but it feels so good you don’t want the free fall
    into absurdity to stop so you laugh right before
    you hit the ground, bodily fluids waiting to cushion your
    fall, but you just dangle there
    a foot from the ground like a captured fish
    waiting to be gutted and put on display.

  28. Carol -Amherst, Mass

    Ponytail

    You run so trim and perky
    You whip your pony tail
    It mocks me from your wobbling head
    As you pass me on the trail

    Do you make it swing on purpose?
    I think you surely do
    Does it burn more fat or calories?
    Does it propel your running shoe?

    The only thing that swings on me
    Is my jangly outer thigh
    My hair’s not long enough to whip
    ‘Cept the eyebrow ‘bove my eye

    You say that I am jealous
    Of course that is not true
    I mean, I could look the same
    Slim and trim like you

    I could whip my pixie
    Back, forth, to and fro
    But what if I should strain my neck
    and off my balance throw

    My rhythm is precise;
    Run, stop, gasp, walk, swig
    Stop and look at ducks in pond
    Run, stop, gasp, walk, swig

    So just because your pony tail
    Is perkier than mine
    It doesn’t mean that I’m not fit
    I just choose to take my time.

  29. AlaskanRC

    Basic Training

    They call it Basic Training-
    Others call it boot camp.
    Exercise at its most extreme;
    with drill sergeants offering their dear encouragement.
    I laugh at the thought as I scan
    the pre-shipment PT minimum qualifications:

    3 push-ups in 1 minute
    17 sit-ups in 1 minute
    1 mile in 9 minutes and 30 seconds

    That’s just for starters I think to myself.
    I better get to it; times two…at least.
    If I hope to survive 4 weeks from now.

    One more poem to go! Congrats to all that have kept up with the challenge all month long :0)

  30. JL Smither

    Survey

    Would you rather live in Denver or Madrid?
    eat oranges or carrots?
    sleep on a mattress or futon pad?
    Do you prefer your poetry to rhyme?
    your seat on the aisle?
    your toilets western style?
    Would you like to skydive?
    to design clothes?
    to write a novel?
    Have you ever thought about opening your own shop?
    running through a field of sunflowers?
    setting fire to something valuable?
    Now what does that say about you?

  31. lyn

    In-line Skating
    For safety it’s best to put on helmet and pads
    Before pulling on the skates and rolling along a surfaced path
    Experienced skaters have a special step glide
    Beginning skaters need to know ok to stumble
    And grab for tree branches or railings especially when skating downhill
    For the maximum workout
    Swing your arms, twist at the waist and take long strides
    Kicking each leg back in turn
    Stretch, swish, speed
    Like dancing on air
    But watch out for gravel, twigs and debris
    Or your skates could catch
    And send you falling, scrambling not to get hurt
    Tuck and roll
    Your head, knees, elbows and wrists are protected
    That’s why it’s best to used safety equipment

  32. Genta

    Day 29
    Prompt 1

    Ready
    I need to remove the worries
    I need to place other cares somewhere else
    I need a stress reliever

    The treadmill offers relief
    I can set and begin
    I can work to a newer me

    I feel the sweat
    I imagine the negativity
    Mixing in and disappearing

    Noticing my waist shrink
    Feeling clothes different
    Loving the extra energy

    Am I ready to go?
    Are you?

    Prompt 2
    The green eyed monster

    You are ready to make a change
    You begin by going to the doctor
    You endure so many tests

    You begin to work out
    You were never like this
    You were Special Forces

    You let go of the chips
    No more breakfast of cereal & milk
    You are eating leaner

    Bicycles are your friends
    You are going by to the military exercises
    Looking healthy, younger

    Slowly becoming the person you were
    You have a whole new out look

  33. lynn rose

    A Thrill of a lifetime
    An experience of a lifetime awaits you.
    You can feel the fresh air, sunshine on
    your face, beautiful scenery, the world
    awaits you. Experience having time to
    yourself or spend time with your best
    friend. Tie up your shoes, get earphones
    ipod, bottle of water and were off. I love
    to go walking and running, I could do it
    for hours at a time. It makes me feel alive
    and clears my mind, keeps my shape and I know
    its very good for me. I’m in my fourties and
    I am enjoying life more then ever before. I am
    in better shape, then when I was in my thirties.
    I bench press three times a week, lift free weights
    I walk an hour every evening. I just love feeling
    good, looking good and it makes me feel incredible.
    Once you experience the feeling of being free, you
    will love it too, an experience of a lifetime.

  34. TaunaLen

    TEENAGER INSTRUCTIONS

    open your eyes
    shut off the alarm
    roll out of bed
    stumble to the sink
    peer into the mirror
    frown, smile
    stick out your tongue

    grab a towel
    turn on the shower
    undress and step
    into the water

    wash your body
    please use soap
    rinse well
    turn off the water
    step out of the shower

    drip onto the bath mat
    as you dry yourself
    try not to slip
    on the wet tile

    apply deodorant
    brush and floss your teeth
    comb and dry your hair
    then dress yourself

    clean toothpaste
    from the mirror and the sink
    pick up the soap, shampoo bottle
    and accoutrements
    from the shower floor
    put them where they belong

    close the shower curtain
    wipe up your wet footprints
    pick up your dirty socks
    toss them in the hamper
    hang your wet towel over the bar

    good morning star-shine
    it’s a new day
    and coffee is waiting
    for you in the kitchen

    oh, and use a clean cup

    TLS, April 2008

  35. Iain D. Kemp

    Patti, LOL. Appreciate it, hon!
    Heather, If I could, I’d send the moggies to hunt Sammy out. Spanish cats will catch anything!

    Great poems today fromeveryone, sorry I was feeling so braindead. Just a thought to those of you who can’t continue. It si only once aweek, so why not pop in sometime (not all the time, just when you can). You’all be missed!

    Personally thsi has been great for me.I haven’t written poetry hardly ata all for years so its really got me back in the groove plus given me impetus to get on with a fiction project that I started years ago too.

    Thanks again to Robert & EVERYONE!!

    ps. Rod, c’mon! a weekly-wednesday school poem???

  36. Carol A Stephen

    Backstroke

    You float,
    on your back

    in murky water
    tread it.

    You wonder if
    you’ll reach shore, or

    just sink like a stone
    head sliding below surface,

    your last sleep
    dark, cold and wet.

    You stretch out
    one arm, break water,

    another arm,
    then the first,

    backstroke.

    You might reach shore after all.

    Just one more poem
    will see you safe on land.

  37. Kevin

    Just A Walk

    Just a walk
    in the woods
    once a day
    with a dog
    at my side.
    A lovely hour
    of trees and rocks
    and babbling brook,
    Exercise enough
    in my book.

    I burned out on Monday’s prompt… just can’t do it. I’m on a committee putting on a writers’ conference this weekend and I was just too swamped. We had a meeting Monday night. I saw the prompt when I got home late and just said, "fuhgetaboutit". I missed a day and I’m late on this one… oh well. (In my defense, I did write a couple poems on Monday and one yesterday… just not prompt related.) (-;

  38. Amanda Caldwell

    Holistic temple

    You need to remember you’re not just a brain
    being carted around in a crafty container.
    You’re a body, flesh, blood, bone, gristle,
    and all those other yucky things like bile,
    snot, veins, intestines, nostril hairs, and sweat.
    Most of all sweat. It’s time to give your body
    something to do besides carry your big head.

    Move it, shake it, dance it, stretch it.
    Get it off the bed, where its legs grow
    numb and cramped from sitting cross-legged,
    and let it transport itself outdoors,
    to draw big breaths of sea air into its lungs,
    to feel the ocean breeze prick up the hairs
    on its skin, to warm in a surprise April sun.
    And, mostly, to sweat. To feel the damp,
    the clammy, the heat, turn into trickle,
    into pour, into life itself mirroring the
    running of blood through pounding veins.

  39. Carla Cherry

    For That Cute Trainer With the Bulging Biceps

    Yeah, baby
    I like the way
    you work me

    kinking my hair
    sweat dripping from my brow
    and careening down my back

    Yeah,
    I know
    I can do it

    I like the way
    you work me

    And that the other women
    are watching
    and green-eyed
    gets me off
    and running
    faster,
    yes
    faster
    just for you

    my waist, cinched
    abs tight
    thighs and buttocks(af)firmed

    You got me
    turning heads
    in the gym.

    Shall we
    meet again,
    same time
    same place?

    Will that be cash
    or charge?

  40. IleanaCarmina

    But It’s Good For You

    No matter how many times you tell me
    I need to work out and how much
    Better I will feel, I will still
    Resist, just because
    You tell me to

    No Nascar

    Your mind seems to run
    Like a stockcar racing
    Around and around
    You might think this is
    A good thing but really
    It’s not because you’re
    Not a car and have no
    Checkered flag to tell
    You if the end is near
    So you can’t know when
    To go for pole position

  41. Justin M. Howe

    Exercise Can Be For You!

    Is going to the gym just not for you?
    Do you look at that machine in the
    corner holding up your jeans and think
    some day you should probably use that
    thing?
    Why don’t you step outside? That’s right,
    you don’t need those muscle men and Barbie
    dolls staring at you cellulite-infused thighs
    while you try desperately to find your
    rhythm on the stair master. Why stay inside
    your home when the fresh air and the blooming
    flowers beckon?
    Do yourself a favor and ride a bike, take a
    hike, do anything but go to the sweat-smelling
    gym or stay in your musty home.
    Act now, carbon monoxide may get the best of
    this planet soon, so hurry and get outside
    before it’s too late!

    -Justin M. Howe

  42. Lorraine Hart

    Bollocks…you’re…your…spelling goofs…tried to proofread, after I found an entire line where my fingers were in a different place. Twenty minutes to go before midnight…falling over, my preshussesssss!

    Teri Coyne…you win hands down for the most said with the most economy…with an added bonus of falling over laughing!

    Take it easy Elizabeth…please.

COMMENT